The other day in rehearsal we were watching video of the last concert to try to recreate timing for a new dancer. And let me say, I DETEST watching myself on video. It never looks like it feels. But this time, I thought it might be different. I think I’m dancing better, stronger, fuller than I ever have.
Yet, video didn’t cease to let me feel discouraged. Here I was, thinking that I’m jumping higher, feeling length through my legs, moving with the strength of my pelvis, feeling voluminous in gestures. But nothing looked like I imagined. There are certain dancers that look just as great on video as they do in person, but I am not one of them (assuming that I look great live, ha!). Listen, I worked for many years archiving dance film and video. I know the pitfalls of the media: video makes things flat, movement dynamics don’t read like they do live, and performance energy is something that can’t be captured as well. But damn. It was a blow to my self-esteem. I have to admit, I came home and gorged. Adding some bloat to the weight I’ve gained back since the show. Must. Get. Back. On. Track.
Hi, I am a new fan from Bloggy Moms. Your profile pic over there is so funny.
http://www.ourbananamoments.com
Marsha
Thanks for stopping by, Marsha! That pic is from a year ago…We both look pretty different now!
Hi! I’m your newest follower.
Melanie
http://yellowrosegiftscompanyblog.blogspot.com/
http://www.yellowrosegiftsco.com
Hello there, Melanie! Thanks for coming in and following along! Hope to see you around these parts again…
G – slap out of it. Or don’t. I’ll love you either way. I totally feel you on the interior perception vs film/reflection. I also know that you tend to not give yourself enough credit. Perhaps the truth lies somewhere waaaaaay above what you think you saw
xoxoxo, r
p.s. Sorry about the ‘slap out of it’ thing – I’ve been watching Cougar Town.
Thanks, R. I do totally need to slap out of it. Though I haven’t watched Cougar Town, so I don’t know if I’m using that right! It’s like when you get all dolled up for a fancy event and you think you look smokin’ all through the night. Then you find pictures later on from about halfway through the night and you had some drinks. You still thought you looked great, but looking at the pictures, you’re all splotchy from too much wine, your hair has fallen flat, and there’s that bra strap that’s hanging out? Yeah, that.
You are certainly right about perception but it works in reverse as well. It’s very possible other people who watch the video as being 10x’s better than you think you are. It’s the nature of the beast! Have a great Easter weekend!
Clayton
http://www.claytonpaulthomas.com
facebook: claytonpaulthomas
G- You are totally using ‘slap out of it’ correctly. Also, that bit about getting dolled up? That’s me every day this week. I leave the house thinking that I’m lookin’ pretty good (clean, deodorized, mascara, lip gloss) then I catch a glimpse of myself reflected in a window… and I look like a sweaty, bloated caricature of myself. I’ve given myself until Sunday to wallow, then I have to slap out of it and figure out what’s up.
Following via Sit & Relax Weekend Hop
Life Below Zero
http://casinofreebies3.blogspot.com/
I’m getting back on track after Easter! Love your blog!
I’m a new follower from the blog hop! Hope you can hop by and visit my blog too!
http://stylendecordeals.blogspot.com/
Clayton – nice slant on things, I like it! Have a great weekend, too!
R – OK…so we BOTH snap out of this funk ASAP. Right?
Hi Nancy! Thanks for stopping in. Following you too!
Hop’pin by from ‘Sit & Relax Weekend Hop’. I’m following your blog now, wont you please come and follow me back?? ~KM
Krafty Max Originals
Hey there KM! Thanks for hop’in in!
Hi! I’m your newest follower from the blog hop. Hope you’re having a fantastic weekend!
Hope you’ll follow me back!
Nancy
http://thatsoundslikecrazy.blogspot.com
Hi Nancy – following you too. Thanks for hopping in!