The 12 of you that regularly read this blog may have been wondering where I’ve been lately.

No, I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth.  I’ve just spent the last two weeks in the bowels of school fundraising. Swimming in last minute errands and tidying up projects. And managing to let everything else around me slide down in to a muddy, stinky pit of procrastination and forgetfulness.

I was so busy that I was unable to keep up with the basic things in life like paying bills, getting enough sleep, and regular bowel movements.

For the past four months, I had been coordinating and executing 11 grade-level art projects for our schools’ biggest fundraising event of the year. And I am no artist.  My stick figures would make any preschool teacher cringe.  I have yet to find my .

Thank god for a wonderful art teacher who guided me through every project and held my hand as I begged for suggestions on art supplies and techniques.  Together we made a great team and helped the students produce some really fantastic pieces of children’s art.

But I think I’d rather walk barefoot over hot coals naked while carrying a fridge on my back as birds peck at my eyeballs than volunteer to do that again.

Don’t get me wrong, it was nice to meet some other parents in the school, to befriend some wonderful teachers, and get to know administration on a first-name basis.

But the operative word in this whole endeavor is VOLUNTEER.  As in, I didn’t get paid, and neither did anyone else.  And it was a ton of work.  And time.  Time I’d rather spend next year looking for work that does pay.  Or at the very least, spending that time making sure my underwear get washed regularly.

On top of the time I spent helping to get this event organized last week during the kids’ school hours, there was all the other life things that overtook my schedule and sanity.  Like missing naps three days in a row to get doctor’s visits or errands in.  Or having sandwiches for dinner in the car those same three days in a row on the way to a baseball game or soccer practice or dance recital photos.

All while my husband was called out of town for work.

Normally, things don’t coincide quite like that.  But when they do?  It wreaks havoc on the whole energy of the house.  The kids felt it, for sure, and retaliated with sour moods and shredded patience with each other.  And me.  And my sour mood.

I wouldn’t say that we’re over-scheduled on a regular basis, so I didn’t have a plan in place for a week like last week.  How do people do that all the time?

Thankfully, things have slowed way down and are returning to normal.  Now that I’m not burning the candle at both ends, I’m a bit less stressed out on those evenings when bedtime is pushed late for a baseball game.  I can plan a meal that has at least two representatives from the basic food groups.  And I’m remembering to brush my teeth.

I can remember all of this chaos and running around when I was a teenager.  Eating egg-salad sandwiches in the car on the way from school to dance class, all the while covertly changing in to my tights and leotard with the deft and limberness of a contortionist as we drove down the highway.

But now that I’M the parent?  It sucks.  So I’m asking for help.

Those of you that have these kinds of schedules in place All The Time, what’s your secret?

I’m not talking about the “just take a moment to breathe” or “make it all the night before” kind of advice, but the honest “this saved my ass more than once” kind of tricks.

How do you manage to keep  one kid entertained while trying to watch the other hit home runs or do shuffle-hop-steps?  How do you keep them from getting scurvy on a steady diet of peanut butter sandwiches or fast food?  And how do you keep from pulling your hair out when you realize you haven’t had a moment to yourself all day?